I mean the wind. The light. The coolness of the starry sky. I flew to the old familiar places inside my soul every spare minute I could find these last few weeks. I wanted that even more than I wanted sleep. Imagine that, if you will.
I painted while I was in that moment. The moment. And that is what I have to share with you now. It is my humble offering, my church song, my burning candle and my silent prayers.
This painting has been re-worked. I started it about 7 years ago. It was initially a portrait of a musician I had fallen madly in love with. It was essentially lifeless regardless of my depth of devotion, but it was still a painting worthy of some attention. I held on to it knowing one day I would get a chance to figure out what I wanted it to become.
When I paint I paint with the ever changing light in mind. I paint with digital alteration in mind. I paint when I am out of my mind. So, there it all is. Right there.
I have broken through some personal walls lately. I feel like a lot of little things are going in the right direction in my mind. It makes a big difference. Baby steps. Steps. Running. Tumbling. Falling. Getting back up. Walking. Slowly. Walking.
You get the idea.
About the painting...
I need the light to dance. I need the shadows to shift. I need to see the awkward phases and the beautiful phases. I need to see the lines. The depths. The emotion. I need to get it all out onto the canvas. After all, it's not just a painting--this is me trying to tell you (and you and you) how I feel. I feel.
Feast your eyes. Feast your heart. Leave a little for me.
Mixed media on canvas.
(see the light reflecting off of her cheek?)