Today I had an epiphany which I think most artists will appreciate. I realized I was beating myself up for resting. A part of me was anxious to be at rest. Inertia is scary though, am I right? Well, I realized, when in my studio this evening, I still had giddy feelings even though I wasn't actually doing anything in there other than packaging stuff to ship out to various locations throughout the globe. Which means I still love to be me, essentially.
In turn, this made me realize my artist-life is growing. A little every week. Every day. Every year. Whoa. How many times have I given up already? I think I am somewhere in the ball park of 50056. How many times have I restarted? 5057. Alright alright alright.
So? It's August. It's been hotter than the devil's butt-crack (???).
I've been too messed up with the heat to be of much use to anyone... or so I thought. So I thought.
Really, what happened was I have been taking time to do nuthin' and very little of it. No.
No... I just gave up a little control and asked for help.
No. No. No.
I insisted on having help.
Lately? My kitchen is very clean and I didn't do it.
Learning to be part of a family means becoming just one in the crowd. I don't have to be or even want to be the boss of it all. I just want to be one of the peas in the pod.
One of the niblets on the cob.
It's hard to stay down when surrounded by the ones you love especially when they love you back with equal or greater force.